


you should see what's in the medicine cabinet

by thecarlysutra



Category: Mr. and Mrs. Smith (2005)
Genre: F/M, Post-Canon, Yuletide Madness Drabble Invitational, yumadrin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-23
Updated: 2017-12-23
Packaged: 2019-02-19 03:33:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13115100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecarlysutra/pseuds/thecarlysutra
Summary: On life when your wife's purse contains five lethal weapons, and you have to get her something for Christmas.





	you should see what's in the medicine cabinet

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tielan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tielan/gifts).



  
John is still cranky after discovering half of Jane’s lipstick tubes contain shrapnel and gunpowder. Pipe bombs do not belong on the bathroom counter, and each Dior lipstick costs thirty-five dollars.

“I don’t understand why you can’t make weapons out of that drugstore crap,” he says.

“I don’t wear drugstore crap, John,” she says. 

This after she made a Molotov cocktail out of the perfume he gave her for their anniversary. He asks again about price, and she rattles off a statistic about chemical composition and flashpoint. 

“You’re impossible to shop for,” he says. “For Christmas you’re just getting sex.”  



End file.
